Why can't time stand still?

The boy friend has gone home, I had a wisdom tooth pulled out a week before he went, also I found out the day he was packing that my only grand parent had a stroke and was in hospital.

That was April 21st.

He went home on the 22nd.

Today is another bank holiday, and I find out that my grand mother has only 24 - 48 hours left to live. And again, the boyfriend is nowhere to be seen, deciding instead that shopping is more important. I guess he cannot handle situations of support very well. I nearly went to the hospital to have my tooth pulled out on my own, after he over slept. He only woke up as I was about to leave because he heard me moving around.

I ask myself this question a bit, "Am I doing the right thing, or am I putting myself into another situation that will turn out to be a disaster?"
I hope that time will tell the honesty on that one, I have never been good at making the right decisions for myself, yet when I come to help others, I am a wiz... what the hell is wrong with me?

So here I sit, waiting for my big brother to descend on my house and soon likely my mother will arrive. Do I go to work tomorrow, I don't even know. I don't have anyone to ask, and I sure as hell would like to know what I am supposed to do. I can't even cry..

He's getting ready to come back over in August. But first he is going to Florida, and Disney world, as a treat for his younger sister. I want to get away from it all.. I have really had enough at this moment in time. Trying to book a holiday to take my brood on their first one abroad.. nowhere special.. only to Spain.. but its a logistic nightmare.

Anyway I'm going to sound off.. supposed to be cooking dinner and sorting sleeping arrangements.
Adieu.