Just another thought...

It's the things that make you go mmmm..

Kisa was a gift to me <3 Thank you for the memories..

Thursday, July 23, 2015

I don't know anymore.

I am hurt..
I am confused.
I cannot seem to find my "one"..
I cannot trust my own self to make the right judgement. Every time I have I seem to have gotten it so badly wrong. I have heard the term " 3rd time lucky" I thought that was my dream..
I'm going to stop.
Love certainly doesn't want me.

Sunday, July 19, 2015

o m g =(

Its 3:34 am.. Saturday night/Sunday morning.

For some unknown reason my skype unblocked a certain someone.. and now im sitting here crying my god damn eyes out. I cant do this..

How can I still feel this pain after so long? I am trying.. I think.. why this hell does this happen to me? 

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Because of you...

I think of you everyday,
I wish these thoughts would go away,
I wish you would grow a pair,
And let me know, why you no longer care.

Why is it no me you want to see,
Being together happily?
What did I do that was so wrong
When you made me think that your love was so strong.
Have you really moved so far from me
And together we will never be?

I wish I knew what to do.
I'm confused and hurt,
Because of you.

Tuesday, July 07, 2015

Alone..again with just memories.

What did I do?
What could I say?
To stop you from turning away?
The times we shared, the times I cared,
None of this seems fair.

I love you to your very core.
Of this I know and am sure.
But like all others you threw me away.
It hurts more and more, day by day.

Where do I go?
What do I do?
I am still loving you.

Sunday, June 28, 2015

Where's my happy ending?


I found this page.. Made me smile, and cry but if I had made it, it says everything.

I still want to believe.. I guess I am not entitled to a happy ending.  So be it. 

Thursday, May 21, 2015

And so to the end..

I think I finally realised today that it has come to an end. I was holding on, waiting, in the hope that he would realise that he had made a wrong judgement. I guess he hasn't.

He's got a girl, though I am a bit skecptical if he is happy with her or not. Guess none of that matters.
I am still in pain after all this time. I am still confused. If he had married me, I would have relocated anywhere in the world with him, but he never tested my loyalty at all.  I wake up hoping each day is different, that I don't have to cry the tears that come. My brave "front" only lasts for so long. How come I keep getting it so very wrong? How come I don't understand?

Saturday, March 07, 2015


No particular order....: